January 2010
12 posts
4 tags
Conversational Series #46
Pop your trunk so I can put the printer in...What is that? - Dad
Oh, it's ninja sword. - Me
Why do you have two? - Dad
One broke down. - Me
Jan 1st
December 2009
25 posts
3 tags
Dec 31st
Dec 30th
Dec 29th
1 tag
Conversational Series #45
Baby girl!! Sorry you didn't get to come out last night. - B
Ha, it's ok. Probably for the best. -Me
And for some reason, that fact that Mars Attacks! is on reminded me of you. -B
Dec 28th
2 tags
Dec 26th
1 tag
Conversational Series #13
Where is Dad? - Me, in a towel having just showered
Outside I think, why? - Mom
There is a dead bird foot in my bathroom. -Me
Yup, I'm sure he knows something about that. - Mom
Dec 24th
Happy Holidays!
jakeandamir: Tumblr users: Reblog this post by Dec. 26th and we will follow your blog by Jan. 1st! These boys are my favorite. Do yourselves a favor and watch one (or all) of their videos. Laugh accordingly.
Dec 24th
1,102 notes
1 tag
Conversational Series #40
Hey, I left my hair clip on your dresser. - Me
Oh, you mean this dead bird looking thing?- Best Male Friend
Yes. -Me
Dec 23rd
To-do List
Before leaving for Corpus tomorrow: 1)Update iPod with new GaGa CD 2)Return video tapes to Vulcan Video 3)Take trash out 4)Pack toiletries 5)Fucking remember to put the new GaGa on iPod 6)Get gas 7)Put cat in car 8)Pay attention while driving
Dec 21st
Dec 21st
1 note
Dec 20th
4 tags
Conversational Series #666 aka Shopping
Well, now they've thought of EVERYTHING. - Merrill in response to a bedazzled pair of tweezers at Forever 21
They can bedazzle anything. -Me
If they sold tampons here I would never have to go to any other store ever again. -Merrill
They should make bedazzled tampons! -Me
Ehh...gross. -Cashier while wincing
Well, maybe just little embellishment on the string. A little tassel hanging off the end. -Me
Dec 20th
2 tags
Dec 18th
1 tag
Conversational Series #Always
“Us having romantic lives is like an inside joke.” -Jaime RT’ing Merrill tonight.
Dec 17th
1 tag
Conversational Series #party
So, was that you in the bathroom with me last night when I was peeing and that fat girl with the pink thong showing from her jeans came into the bathroom and started puking bright red in the bathtub? -Me
Yes. -Laura
So glad. - Me
Dec 12th
Dec 10th
20 notes
3 tags
Dec 8th
1 tag
Conversational Text
Text received at 10:30 am on 12-7-09 “Hey, this could be a potentially awkward, but serious question: would you want to have a threesome sometime very soon?” -male friend. So much for texts from last night. Good morning. Should I be flattered that I’m the first person my male friends think of to have sex with a girl?
Dec 7th
Dec 5th
4 tags
Conversational Series #35
“I had a really intense sex dream about my ex-wife last night.” -Roommate “That’s weird.” -Me “Yea…she was covered in ectoplasm.” -Roomate “…!!!” -Me
Dec 4th
1 tag
Dec 4th
Email from my t.a.
“Read the pink sheet on sex statistics, go over teenage depression, read the article on oral and anal sex. Also remember the Heinz dilemma. And vaginas. Don’t forget vaginas.” Don’t you wish your final exam was hot like me? Er, mine. Who wants to help me study?
Dec 3rd
Dec 3rd
1 tag
Conversational Series #34
“What is that for?” -D “I was having a nervous breakdown, so I bought a plant.” -Me “Is it helping?” -D “I can’t tell, I think it’s broken.” -Me
Dec 3rd